Tag Archives: adulthood

What the Water Does For My Words

19 May

I don’t know why I get to this place

away from the joy I used to know

almost afraid to count my blessings

nearly afraid to hope

it’s been a long road

towards home

wet and muddy

close to flooding

I usually feel something different in the rain

It’s always been my soul cleanse of choice

(and my cliche poem topic, too)

I’d stop and see

what the water does for my words

how it rinses the dust in my heart

and carries away old, dead thinking

now it’s just some kind of shivering, wet gibberish

trying to build a bridge

in the gap of thoughts

as water rushes in

I wish it were profound and real

but right now, it’s just me

empty and full again

washed and cold and waiting for the sun

stuck in-between the truth I know will set me free

and wishing for anywhere, anything else

all the potential in the world wrapped up in a feeling

fickle as spring weather in Texas

then I close my eyes and  I am a child

tracing raindrops with my finger as they race

down the outside of the car window

 I am going fast and it doesn’t matter where

I am alive

once again finding wonder

in puddle jumping

and the sensation

of the rain on my skin

RS47U87JM0

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27 Reasons Why 27 is Better Than 17

24 Aug

1. I believe in fairy tales again– not the cliché perfectionist view of love, but the magic of every day life.

2. I have learned to love myself. To brush aside my flaws, to give myself grace.

3.  Things that once stirred nameless inside of me, now have names.

4. I know more than ever, I am a writer. I am not ashamed of this.

5. I am not afraid to screw up and fall. In fact, I am confident that I will.

6. I am no longer waiting for a man to fix my life.

7. I have a man who reminds me that life is beautiful and so am I.

8. The skeletons in my closet have long been thrown into a bottomless ocean.

9. My expectations are lower, so my joy comes quicker.

10. I don’t have to “figure everything out.”

11. It is not the end of the world–this too shall pass.

12. My pain doesn’t define me.

13. People are just … people.

14. I am able to see my own story in a wider context, my eyes are not just focused on the awful and stormy beginning chapters of adolescence.

My 17-year-old artistic attempts.

15. I’ve seen more bad but I’ve also seen more redemption.

16. I am not completely sure of what I believe, and that’s ok.

17. “Gospel” is not a stale, religious word, but life and bread.

18. I know I can’t “fix myself” and it’s a sweet relief.

19. I am no longer attempting to change the world–at least not the way I thought I would.

20. My life plans have been crumpled up and thrown out the window enough times to know that next time I may as well just fold them into a paper airplane and laugh as they fly away.

21. I am no longer counting the second (third, fourth, etc) chances I get, because I am no longer worried they’ll run out and I won’t “deserve” any more.

22. Friendship: fewer, deeper. Those that stick through all the changes are truly life-long.

23. I’ve learned to educate myself.

24. The world is a bit crazier maybe, but there are way more possibilities.

25. I may be 30 pounds heavier, but now I have curves! 😉

26. Connecting with Jesus is not limited to church services, bible reading, and not screwing up.

27. Happiness has nothing to do with geography.

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